Here we are just a day after the 9th of December I think about you everyday with pictures of you all around me and feeling the emptiness of your absence filling my head and burning my eyes with tears. I miss you my sweet dainty little lady. So much has happened since you have gone away, so much of it hurts so deep inside. How do I ever deal with the sadness that never seem to lighten, never seems to go away. One day just one day of trying hard not to think of you and remember the little things you loved, the little precious hands the pitter patter of your tiny feet running though the house are here no more. Oh how deep in my heart I wish things were not this way. The loss of more then just you the loss of so much love I once felt deep in my heart for those who love you so much as I do. How will things ever get better? how will the pain ever subside and one to feel whole again to feel normal again. Only God knows Only God cares. So many thoughts, so many feelings of you and the ache left inside due to you being gone. I have missed so much with so many mistakes made and so much anger. Some days I long to join you. to see you again and see your beautiful little smile. To hear you say Grandma just one more time I would give my all for. But I can't nothing seems any better then when you were here. In some ways maybe it was better for you not to see,not to know or be a part of. I love you Pillar that will never ever change. feeling the pain of all the effects I guess will never go away. but today just a day after the date you left us. here I am still thinking of you watching my videos of you laughing,dancing and acting the little girl you were meant to be. I wish it was all different.